Monday, December 19, 2011

back to the run, and not joining any programs

I got back out there for my run this morning, after having missed both Wednesday and Friday's runs last week due to fatigue from holiday event schedules.  Rolling out of bed at 4:25 felt absolutely wretched...but once I was out there on the pavement, it felt FANTASTIC.  So good to be back to what my body loves.  This week (especially after missing 2 runs last week) I am sticking with just running the faster-to-me but not-yet-3-steps-per-second rate for a full 30 minutes.  

I realized this morning that I've kind of been coasting, for the last week, where it comes to loving my body.  My food choices have not been stellar, on top of missing those 2 runs.  I've been sliding into not paying attention, and that's a major place of giving up ground in my life (I think it is part of the cause for all the times I've "found" the 50 or so pounds that I've lost so many times.)  So I've been leaning into the Lord this morning, and I'll keep pressing in for letting Him teach me to love my body.

Meanwhile, last week a coworker came to let me know he's working on starting a TOPS group at work.  Was I interested?  I think he was disappointed at my immediate no.  He tried to encourage me a bit, and I appreciate the intent - he didn't know me before my recent return from JPUSA, and my weight loss happens so slowly and such small increments that he probably is unaware that it is even happening.  To one with no history with me, I surely just look like a lady with a weight problem who should open herself to a program.  I just grinned at him and told him, "I am DONE with programs.  I am sticking with what I am doing - I've lost 50 pounds in the last year and a half."  This conversation happened while we were both quite busy, so I wasn't at liberty to explain the details of "what I am doing," so I suppose in some ways that conversation wasn't very fair to him.

Maybe I'll get a chance to clarify one day.

Happy Monday, all. 

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