I mentioned recently that I am in training for a 5K in early June. My plan: to ratchet up from 3 to 5 mornings a week, for the next 5 weeks or so, crossing all the way over the Centennial bridge and back home again, a journey of 2.6 miles. Sure, it's a little shorter than a 5K, but I figured if I push myself, I'll be in good enough shape to at least FINISH the race, and that's really the only goal at this point.
I had been considering doing something else besides the bridge, 2 mornings a week - more specifically, I had been thinking of running up my mile-long Main Street hill instead. Just for further conditioning on hill running.
This week brought an unexpected turn of events that have made me certain about the need to focus on the hill: a friend talked me into agreeing to run The Bix in late July. For the uninitiated, The Bix is a 7 MILE hill-infested run in the hottest part of summer.
Oh. Em. GEEE!!!
Over my objection to the fact that this race is more than TWICE as long as the one I've been training for, my friend simply pointed out that we can walk part of it. This is the same friend who (unsuccessfully) worked on me about doing a triathlon, and then asked about doing I think 90 days of my T-tap program for another sort of competitive event (I didn't bite on that one either), and truth: I'm out of resistance. LOLOL
So part of me is filled with fear, dread, loathing, and general confusion about how I got roped into this.
And part of me is kind of secretly excited.
I shall start the hill training next week, cuz I'ma need to work on over to the Brady Street hill (in my mind a.k.a. The Hill of Death) in the next 60 days or so, if I'm going to stand a prayer of not collapsing in the heat on race day. PEOPLE. I run at 5 AM. Do you KNOW how nice and dark and cool it is for running at that hour?! The air all kind of just goes out of me when I imagine running in 100 degrees and sunshine - and it seems ALWAYS to be that hot on race day.
Meanwhile, it turns out to be a very good thing indeed that my friend has coerced me into this, as I had a big epiphany this morning while running: the weekend of the Rhubarb Run - that 5K out in my hometown that I've been training for - HEY, I won't even be in Illinois that day! I'll be on vacation, states and states away. I can't DO that race. Ergh. So the Bix shall be the new driver of my goals.
We'll see how this goes. I've already noticed that when I run 5 mornings a week, my knees are sore by Friday. Last weekend I noticed it, and thought how I should rest my knees for the weekend...and then I went out and rode my bike 64 miles in 2 days. Which just meant sufficient pain on Monday morning that I had to skip the run. It's Friday again, and I only got 3 runs in (skipped Wednesday morning, too, after a rather late Tuesday night)...and somehow my knees are sore again (maybe it's more the length of time I'm running than the frequency - it takes me 40-45 minutes to accomplish that 2.6 mile run...see, still not anything like speedy - many walkers could probably pass me at that rate).
And...I'm NOT planning to stay off the bike this weekend.
So, how's this gonna go? Not sure. If anyone reading this has any great tips for strengthening knees and/or dealing with that pain (other than "stay off the bike," that is)...I'd welcome them!
Friday, April 27, 2012
Saturday, April 21, 2012
adventures in chia gel and bike path connections
Two weeks ago I did some research on chia seeds, after my food-wise JPUSA friend had mentioned them. Among the things I learned from the rawreform.com website about chia seeds include:
Chia seeds are said to have:
So I picked up a big container of them (to the tune of $14.99) and almost immediately forgot I had 'em.
On Thursday I remembered, and read up on what to DO with my wonderful chia seeds. The best suggestion I found was making "chia gel." This involves stirring 1/3 cup of chia seeds into 2 cups of filtered water and letting them sit at least 10 minutes (with a suggestion that letting 'em sit longer releases more of the nutrition.) Chia gel, I learned, is essentially flavorless and can be stirred into lots and lots of things, where it "distributes" the flavor rather than "absorbing" it. Why would I add chia gel?
Here's what the tiny chia seeds look like in their container:
Here's what the gel looked like the next morning;
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And then I added a lot of frozen fruit, and let it sit for about 45 minutes while I got ready for work before hitting the "on" button:
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2 bananas, a bunch of mango, some blueberries, a few cherries, a few mandarin oranges, and a few strawberries. YUMMO. When I first started blending, there was a lot of black and I thought the smoothie might come out looking nasty. But it's pretty, don't you think?
I took it to work with me and it lasted for a couple of hours. Really, REALLY good. I'll be happy to use the chia gel some more.
On a non-food related front, today I did the Duck Creek bike path again, and at the spot that I thought was the absolute end, another cyclist passed me as I climbed a particularly steep part. Then she disappeared around a corner I hadn't seen, so I followed her...and found more bike path! Eventually I came to the end of it, at a sign announcing that I was in Riverdale.
At that point I had a few minutes that were reminiscent for me of my many great bus adventures in Chicago. I had a pretty good idea that I was somewhere near the river front path (as in, along the Mississippi River) but I didn't know how to get there. I've studied the maps online repeatedly, but have just never been able to quite work out how or where the 2 paths might converge. I used my iphone but the map was confusing. I debated...might be better to just turn and go back the way I came. But instead I turned on my bus adventurer skills and did the basics:
Great stuff. And my ride rounded out to 26 miles. Not bad for a ride squeezed in at the end of an otherwise busy day.
Hope your Saturday made you smile as well!
Chia seeds are said to have:
helps transfer calcium into your bones, They are a complete source of protein, providing all the essential amino acids in an easily digestible form. They are also a fabulous source of soluble fibre. |
So I picked up a big container of them (to the tune of $14.99) and almost immediately forgot I had 'em.
On Thursday I remembered, and read up on what to DO with my wonderful chia seeds. The best suggestion I found was making "chia gel." This involves stirring 1/3 cup of chia seeds into 2 cups of filtered water and letting them sit at least 10 minutes (with a suggestion that letting 'em sit longer releases more of the nutrition.) Chia gel, I learned, is essentially flavorless and can be stirred into lots and lots of things, where it "distributes" the flavor rather than "absorbing" it. Why would I add chia gel?
- for all that wonderful nutrition as listed above
- it helps fill one up for fewer hunger pangs between meals
- chia seeds hold 9 times their weight in water, helping the body with hydration and stamina
- they are supposed to have a detoxifying/cleansing effect on the body as well
Here's what the tiny chia seeds look like in their container:
 |
| I made the gel in a quart jar, as it keeps up to something like 3 weeks in the fridge. Canning funnel came in handy for working with those tiny seeds, which are all staticky and want to go everywhere. |
Here's what the gel looked like the next morning;
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2 bananas, a bunch of mango, some blueberries, a few cherries, a few mandarin oranges, and a few strawberries. YUMMO. When I first started blending, there was a lot of black and I thought the smoothie might come out looking nasty. But it's pretty, don't you think?
On a non-food related front, today I did the Duck Creek bike path again, and at the spot that I thought was the absolute end, another cyclist passed me as I climbed a particularly steep part. Then she disappeared around a corner I hadn't seen, so I followed her...and found more bike path! Eventually I came to the end of it, at a sign announcing that I was in Riverdale.
At that point I had a few minutes that were reminiscent for me of my many great bus adventures in Chicago. I had a pretty good idea that I was somewhere near the river front path (as in, along the Mississippi River) but I didn't know how to get there. I've studied the maps online repeatedly, but have just never been able to quite work out how or where the 2 paths might converge. I used my iphone but the map was confusing. I debated...might be better to just turn and go back the way I came. But instead I turned on my bus adventurer skills and did the basics:
- Trust that all will be well, and don't panic.
- Look - watch - allow time to really SEE. (It's easy on bus or bike adventures to miss important details, if one gets in a hurry or doesn't pay intent attention.)
- Listen intently, trusting that hearing will come.
- Try - don't just stand there forever - and know that backtracking and trying again is acceptable and often necessary.
Great stuff. And my ride rounded out to 26 miles. Not bad for a ride squeezed in at the end of an otherwise busy day.
Hope your Saturday made you smile as well!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
training for rhubarb, and great big happy thighs
I am now officially "in training" for the Rhubarb Run put on by the Mercer County Family YMCA out in Aledo, which is in roughly 6 weeks, I think. I've relaxed a bit over the winter with the run - have stopped trying to run faster or further. My excuse was that it's hard enough to run in winter. LOL But lately I've noticed that since the move, I'm not running quite as far as I used to, which means I'm also not running quite as fast.
I had meant to find the tiny running book (haven't seen it since the move, though I know it's here somewhere) and see about re-starting intervals. But instead I'm taking a different tactic this week. It's supposed to be rainy all week, so I'm not counting on biking to work (she says as she frowns at the gorgeous morning and remembers that there are too many errands today for biking anyway.) So I'm taking advantage of not needing to leave at 7:15, by adding distance to the run. I've been running "most of the way" across the Centennial, but always turning around in time to limit my run to 30 minutes. This morning, I just went ahead and ran "all the way" across it (and back, of course) which added about 10 minutes to my run.
If you're more alert than me, you might notice that I just said I ran this morning - on a TUESDAY - which is very much NOT a run morning for me. I'm a MWF runner. But that's the other part of this training...in addition to running further, I'm planning to do 5 mornings per week for the next 5 weeks or so, to crank up the volume. And yes, I also shall find the tiny running book so that in the next week or two I can get back to intervals, which should increase my speed again.
It felt good, going all the way across. I do enjoy the parts of my runs that make me feel like a hero Yesterday, that was running in winds that just about knocked me over. This morning, it was reaching the other side. This is a fun change in me, in this 16 months of letting God teach me to love my body: I actually derive real enjoyment from physical challenges. I am encouraged. I feel good. It is FUN, not just "a challenge."
The hilly parts of the bridge really work my butt and the fronts of my thighs. I don't spend a lot of time checking out my butt in the mirror (I remember obsessing about it as a teen, mostly because of course that was where all the boys' eyes were, so you wanted it looking as good as possible, you know? LOL) but my thighs are right there in front of me. I keep noticing that though they are still pretty fatty, there is also quite a bit of muscle building there. When the cellulite clears, that's gonna be fun!
And that's a way I'm really, really growing in loving my body. I acquired my "thunder thighs" at puberty, and immediately started experiencing deep shame about them. I was so bothered that my thighs weren't all tiny like my ectomorph-body-type friends. I just wanted very small thighs, and no future that didn't include that looked like a happy one.
Today, I understand that I am NOT an ectomorph body type, and never will be. If I get fully fit, especially by running and biking, I'm gonna have big thighs. They will be big muscular rather than big cellulite, but they will still be big. I'm not gonna have that wide space between the tops of my inner thighs that the other body type enjoys. And...drum roll, please...I am fine with that! I am actually ENJOYING watching the muscle build, and yes, loving my body, even while it's still fairly well encased in a major layer of subcutaneous fat.
That's a God thing, baby.
May you find it, too, if you haven't yet.
I had meant to find the tiny running book (haven't seen it since the move, though I know it's here somewhere) and see about re-starting intervals. But instead I'm taking a different tactic this week. It's supposed to be rainy all week, so I'm not counting on biking to work (she says as she frowns at the gorgeous morning and remembers that there are too many errands today for biking anyway.) So I'm taking advantage of not needing to leave at 7:15, by adding distance to the run. I've been running "most of the way" across the Centennial, but always turning around in time to limit my run to 30 minutes. This morning, I just went ahead and ran "all the way" across it (and back, of course) which added about 10 minutes to my run.
If you're more alert than me, you might notice that I just said I ran this morning - on a TUESDAY - which is very much NOT a run morning for me. I'm a MWF runner. But that's the other part of this training...in addition to running further, I'm planning to do 5 mornings per week for the next 5 weeks or so, to crank up the volume. And yes, I also shall find the tiny running book so that in the next week or two I can get back to intervals, which should increase my speed again.
It felt good, going all the way across. I do enjoy the parts of my runs that make me feel like a hero Yesterday, that was running in winds that just about knocked me over. This morning, it was reaching the other side. This is a fun change in me, in this 16 months of letting God teach me to love my body: I actually derive real enjoyment from physical challenges. I am encouraged. I feel good. It is FUN, not just "a challenge."
The hilly parts of the bridge really work my butt and the fronts of my thighs. I don't spend a lot of time checking out my butt in the mirror (I remember obsessing about it as a teen, mostly because of course that was where all the boys' eyes were, so you wanted it looking as good as possible, you know? LOL) but my thighs are right there in front of me. I keep noticing that though they are still pretty fatty, there is also quite a bit of muscle building there. When the cellulite clears, that's gonna be fun!
And that's a way I'm really, really growing in loving my body. I acquired my "thunder thighs" at puberty, and immediately started experiencing deep shame about them. I was so bothered that my thighs weren't all tiny like my ectomorph-body-type friends. I just wanted very small thighs, and no future that didn't include that looked like a happy one.
Today, I understand that I am NOT an ectomorph body type, and never will be. If I get fully fit, especially by running and biking, I'm gonna have big thighs. They will be big muscular rather than big cellulite, but they will still be big. I'm not gonna have that wide space between the tops of my inner thighs that the other body type enjoys. And...drum roll, please...I am fine with that! I am actually ENJOYING watching the muscle build, and yes, loving my body, even while it's still fairly well encased in a major layer of subcutaneous fat.
That's a God thing, baby.
May you find it, too, if you haven't yet.
Monday, April 16, 2012
shutting up the lizard
Seth Godin writes a blog I really like...little short bits of really wise stuff on all manner of subjects. A couple of months ago, he wrote briefly about "the lizard brain." I wanted to post a link to that blog, but as I googled it just now, I discovered he has spoken and written rather extensively on it, actually, so I can't find the little bit I read without digging harder than I'm willing to do in the 10 minutes I have to blog here. The gist of it that day was that the lizard brain in us kills productivity in frustrating little ways like this: you've locked the door. YOU KNOW you've locked the door. You're sure you've locked the door. And you need to get going. But the lizard brain keeps insisting that you might have actually forgotten to lock it, and so you waste time and run yourself late by going back to check the locks again. (This appears to be not the "main" way that Godin explains it, but this was the thing I saw that started the little train down the tracks of my brain.)
Remember road trips as we grew up? What does mom say to you before you head out for many hours in the car?
"Do you need to use the bathroom? Are you SURE? We're not stopping 5 minutes down the road. You'd better just TRY."
It's just a conscientious thing moms do, trying to smooth the drive. My mom did it. I REALLY did it, once I started hauling around 6 or 8 daycare kids. It was just flat MANDATORY that everyone "try" the bathroom before we left.
That habit has held on, though I haven't had daycare kids in something like a decade now and my own kids are full-fledged adults. I've jokingly complained to my daughter about my "well trained body" that insists: if we are going somewhere, we MUST potty first. And then when I get there: I have just arrived, so I MUST potty first. It was funny when I lived in Aledo and worked at City Hall, 5 minutes away. I was irritated but also amused that my body insisted on both ends of that equation. It has followed me everywhere I've moved. This past winter, living in the SAME BUILDING where I worked: still true. Use the restroom 5 or 10 minutes before leaving work. Walk the 2 minutes or so it took to get to my end of the building. Step inside my door, and stand there crossing my legs and unable to move, cuz I had to go so bad. Only to find when I got there that it was like A TEASPOON of fluid that had so plagued me. Dumb, dumb, dumb, and I muttered LOTS of irritated things at my body along they way.
So when I read that Seth Godin blog a couple of months ago, I recognized IMMEDIATELY that this was a "lizard brain" function in me. I didn't really know what to do with that, so I just found myself muttering "stupid lizard brain" as I stopped again for the potty on the way out the door.
It has kind of cranked itself up since I started biking to work. On those days, sometimes I hit the restroom 3 times in the last 10 minutes before I leave. My bladder is just frantically screaming, "You're about to go out for a ride! DON'T WE NEED TO POTTY FIRST?!" And then there's that half a teaspoon and me grumbling about the fact that I interrupted my routine for THIS.
Well late last week, I had an epiphany. When that urge hit me, I just said (ALOUD), "Shut up, lizard brain." I wasn't being malicious or angry, just calm and dismissive. And I ignored the screaming bladder, walked by the bathroom out the door, was fine all the way to work and didn't even have to go when I got there.
Now here is the completely FASCINATING part of this for me: that night, for the first night in a long time of memory, I didn't have to get up in the night to use the bathroom. That's just been a part of my reality for YEARS now, the one trip (sometimes two) in the middle of the night. I just figured it was part of aging. And it's not such a big thing...I'm not one of those people who can't get back to sleep after getting up in the night. So really not a hardship, though I've thought more than once that it sure was nice to be younger and not have to have the midnight potty run.
Every night since then: no midnight run! AT ALL! It seems even THAT was a "lizard brain" function and it seems to have been shut off at the same time as this "potty before we walk out the door" phenomenon.
HOW WEIRD IS THAT?! I mean, I LOVE IT but it just absolutely the MOST unexpected development for me.
Freedom comes in strange ways. God is good. I'm gonna keep on pressing in to letting Him teach me to love my body. It's crazy awesome, watching it unfold.
And no, you can't get your money back for a blog that was all about Karen's potty life...that's what you get for hangin' around the naked blog.
Remember road trips as we grew up? What does mom say to you before you head out for many hours in the car?
"Do you need to use the bathroom? Are you SURE? We're not stopping 5 minutes down the road. You'd better just TRY."
It's just a conscientious thing moms do, trying to smooth the drive. My mom did it. I REALLY did it, once I started hauling around 6 or 8 daycare kids. It was just flat MANDATORY that everyone "try" the bathroom before we left.
That habit has held on, though I haven't had daycare kids in something like a decade now and my own kids are full-fledged adults. I've jokingly complained to my daughter about my "well trained body" that insists: if we are going somewhere, we MUST potty first. And then when I get there: I have just arrived, so I MUST potty first. It was funny when I lived in Aledo and worked at City Hall, 5 minutes away. I was irritated but also amused that my body insisted on both ends of that equation. It has followed me everywhere I've moved. This past winter, living in the SAME BUILDING where I worked: still true. Use the restroom 5 or 10 minutes before leaving work. Walk the 2 minutes or so it took to get to my end of the building. Step inside my door, and stand there crossing my legs and unable to move, cuz I had to go so bad. Only to find when I got there that it was like A TEASPOON of fluid that had so plagued me. Dumb, dumb, dumb, and I muttered LOTS of irritated things at my body along they way.
So when I read that Seth Godin blog a couple of months ago, I recognized IMMEDIATELY that this was a "lizard brain" function in me. I didn't really know what to do with that, so I just found myself muttering "stupid lizard brain" as I stopped again for the potty on the way out the door.
It has kind of cranked itself up since I started biking to work. On those days, sometimes I hit the restroom 3 times in the last 10 minutes before I leave. My bladder is just frantically screaming, "You're about to go out for a ride! DON'T WE NEED TO POTTY FIRST?!" And then there's that half a teaspoon and me grumbling about the fact that I interrupted my routine for THIS.
Well late last week, I had an epiphany. When that urge hit me, I just said (ALOUD), "Shut up, lizard brain." I wasn't being malicious or angry, just calm and dismissive. And I ignored the screaming bladder, walked by the bathroom out the door, was fine all the way to work and didn't even have to go when I got there.
Now here is the completely FASCINATING part of this for me: that night, for the first night in a long time of memory, I didn't have to get up in the night to use the bathroom. That's just been a part of my reality for YEARS now, the one trip (sometimes two) in the middle of the night. I just figured it was part of aging. And it's not such a big thing...I'm not one of those people who can't get back to sleep after getting up in the night. So really not a hardship, though I've thought more than once that it sure was nice to be younger and not have to have the midnight potty run.
Every night since then: no midnight run! AT ALL! It seems even THAT was a "lizard brain" function and it seems to have been shut off at the same time as this "potty before we walk out the door" phenomenon.
HOW WEIRD IS THAT?! I mean, I LOVE IT but it just absolutely the MOST unexpected development for me.
Freedom comes in strange ways. God is good. I'm gonna keep on pressing in to letting Him teach me to love my body. It's crazy awesome, watching it unfold.
And no, you can't get your money back for a blog that was all about Karen's potty life...that's what you get for hangin' around the naked blog.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
hill climber woman, and first time on duck creek bike path
I've been looking and looking at bike maps online, trying to figure out how to get on the Duck Creek bike path here in Davenport. A couple of coworkers assured me this week that if I'd just ride up Main Street (which goes right past my house) and keep going in a straight line, I would eventually intersect with it. So that was this morning's objective!
This meant first of all biking up that mile-long hill that I mentioned recently. The LAST time I tried to bike that hill was on the Rafiki Ride last fall, and I was on Lulu, and I definitely had to get off and walk for a portion of the hill. My hope was that with Wilma under me, fewer pounds attached to me, and my improved fitness level, I might just maybe be able to bike up.
I DID IT!!! Now mind you, I had to do A LOT of downshifting, and I was barely moving by the time I got to the top, and I almost threw up from breathing so hard, and my nose gunked up so I had to breathe in through my mouth, which meant my throat was raw for the next 10 miles of the ride, causing continuous coughing and throat clearing...so I'm not exactly a rock star yet...but...I DID IT!!! I felt so good about that accomplishment that the only "sit down and rest" break I took for the whole 25-mile ride was there at the top of the Main Street hill. I got off a few other times to take pics, but I was still all, "Hey, I'm a crazy awesome hill climber," so I didn't feel like taking breaks. LOL
The Duck Creek bike path is GREAT. I love the riverfront path, but riding it allll the time gets old, you know? I just wanted to have a bit of variety. This path is really beautiful, set beside the winding Duck Creek, lined with grounds that are left unmown for conservation reasons. Lots of trees and plants, constant running water, lots of little highly-arched bridges (I giggled with glee every time I crossed one without my stomach clenching or my body tightening up),
It sports tons of hills. Once upon a time, this would have been a negative for me, but at this point I am grateful for the conditioning...every time I struggled my way up a long hill, I could practically FEEL the fat burning, the muscle building, my heart growing stronger, and my lung capacity increasing. This should be excellent conditioning for this year's century ride and next year's Ragbrai.
Fun things I saw along the way included: little league practice, really tiny kids playing soccer, lots of dogs playing catch with their people, robins and other pretty, brightly-colored birds, more than the usual ratio of smiling people of all age and sort who returned my "hello," big burly guys playing a highly competitive game of frisbee golf, Mallard ducks fishing and preening and paddling around in the creek that bears their name, and more women (in my age bracket, even!) than I ever see on the riverfront path. I rode every bit of path I could find and it was exactly 25 miles from leaving my building to returning. There could be more path...I can be kind of oblivious and miss details along the way, but what I saw was GREAT. And oh yeah...there were also quite a number of public restrooms along the way (don't see a ton of those along the riverfront) and lots of neat places to sit down and rest, if I had been so inclined.
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Came home and treated myself to a lovely gigantic plate of sauteed vegetables (cabbage, green beans, carrots, portabella mushrooms, and purple onion) with a bit of brown rice and lots of soy sauce...mmmmmmm....
....pretty nice start for a Saturday.
This meant first of all biking up that mile-long hill that I mentioned recently. The LAST time I tried to bike that hill was on the Rafiki Ride last fall, and I was on Lulu, and I definitely had to get off and walk for a portion of the hill. My hope was that with Wilma under me, fewer pounds attached to me, and my improved fitness level, I might just maybe be able to bike up.
I DID IT!!! Now mind you, I had to do A LOT of downshifting, and I was barely moving by the time I got to the top, and I almost threw up from breathing so hard, and my nose gunked up so I had to breathe in through my mouth, which meant my throat was raw for the next 10 miles of the ride, causing continuous coughing and throat clearing...so I'm not exactly a rock star yet...but...I DID IT!!! I felt so good about that accomplishment that the only "sit down and rest" break I took for the whole 25-mile ride was there at the top of the Main Street hill. I got off a few other times to take pics, but I was still all, "Hey, I'm a crazy awesome hill climber," so I didn't feel like taking breaks. LOL
The Duck Creek bike path is GREAT. I love the riverfront path, but riding it allll the time gets old, you know? I just wanted to have a bit of variety. This path is really beautiful, set beside the winding Duck Creek, lined with grounds that are left unmown for conservation reasons. Lots of trees and plants, constant running water, lots of little highly-arched bridges (I giggled with glee every time I crossed one without my stomach clenching or my body tightening up),
It sports tons of hills. Once upon a time, this would have been a negative for me, but at this point I am grateful for the conditioning...every time I struggled my way up a long hill, I could practically FEEL the fat burning, the muscle building, my heart growing stronger, and my lung capacity increasing. This should be excellent conditioning for this year's century ride and next year's Ragbrai.
Fun things I saw along the way included: little league practice, really tiny kids playing soccer, lots of dogs playing catch with their people, robins and other pretty, brightly-colored birds, more than the usual ratio of smiling people of all age and sort who returned my "hello," big burly guys playing a highly competitive game of frisbee golf, Mallard ducks fishing and preening and paddling around in the creek that bears their name, and more women (in my age bracket, even!) than I ever see on the riverfront path. I rode every bit of path I could find and it was exactly 25 miles from leaving my building to returning. There could be more path...I can be kind of oblivious and miss details along the way, but what I saw was GREAT. And oh yeah...there were also quite a number of public restrooms along the way (don't see a ton of those along the riverfront) and lots of neat places to sit down and rest, if I had been so inclined.
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Came home and treated myself to a lovely gigantic plate of sauteed vegetables (cabbage, green beans, carrots, portabella mushrooms, and purple onion) with a bit of brown rice and lots of soy sauce...mmmmmmm........pretty nice start for a Saturday.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
looking down...yippeee!!! and some contextual pictures
Just a few happy thoughts to share before I rush from one thing to the next...
1. This morning, I joked about maybe "looking down" while crossing the bridge that so terrified me before this week. Then I thought about Peter (as in, New Testament Peter) and how he looked down at the waves and immediately stopped walking on water and started drowning. So I thought...maybe not! But then this morning as I was biking across it, I really felt the Lord saying clearly to me, "Go ahead...exercise the freedom I gave you," and so...I looked down! And I'm still not afraid! And on the way home tonight crossing it, I looked down A LOT. Admired the rushing water to the one side. Looked under the bridge on the other. Looked, and looked, and looked some more, the whole time I rolled across the bridge. And didn't get even the tiniest bit afraid. FREEDOMMMMMM!!!!
2. I think it's time for just one pictoral celebration. While I still have A LOT of weight to lose before I'm anything close to what is medically advised, here is a shot of me in July 2009, as I was leaving for my trip to Switzerland...and a shot of me today after work (my jeans are on their 4th wear since the dryer, so they are NOT sucking anything in or "shaping" me in any way, just for the record.) (I can't figure out how to make blogger put them beside each other, darn it...)
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VIVA LA DIFFERENCE!
**This message brought to you by intentionally grateful living.**
1. This morning, I joked about maybe "looking down" while crossing the bridge that so terrified me before this week. Then I thought about Peter (as in, New Testament Peter) and how he looked down at the waves and immediately stopped walking on water and started drowning. So I thought...maybe not! But then this morning as I was biking across it, I really felt the Lord saying clearly to me, "Go ahead...exercise the freedom I gave you," and so...I looked down! And I'm still not afraid! And on the way home tonight crossing it, I looked down A LOT. Admired the rushing water to the one side. Looked under the bridge on the other. Looked, and looked, and looked some more, the whole time I rolled across the bridge. And didn't get even the tiniest bit afraid. FREEDOMMMMMM!!!!
2. I think it's time for just one pictoral celebration. While I still have A LOT of weight to lose before I'm anything close to what is medically advised, here is a shot of me in July 2009, as I was leaving for my trip to Switzerland...and a shot of me today after work (my jeans are on their 4th wear since the dryer, so they are NOT sucking anything in or "shaping" me in any way, just for the record.) (I can't figure out how to make blogger put them beside each other, darn it...)
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**This message brought to you by intentionally grateful living.**
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
another miracle healing story by the gushy onion
I experienced another miracle healing this week.
It proved to me that miracle healings don't all work the same.
And it has left me pondering the question, "What is prayer?"
You might recall that I've been terrified of heights my entire life. Like, not just scared of being at the top of the Sears Tower (yeah, I know it's now called the Willis Tower, but I don't have to change with that)...like, scared when I stand on a chair. The fear has been strong, visceral, a physical sensation not just in my stomach but in my entire body, combined with a whole lot of mental/emotional baggage.
You might also recall that the Lord has been doing a work in me, where that is concerned. First I crossed that bridge along the Chicago bike path near downtown without fear. Then I moved back here and have been running on the Centennial Bridge (a place high enough that it was once bordering on debilitating for me to walk it) without fear.
Still, there has been one holdout: the bicycle bridge that connects Illinois to Arsenal Island. It sort of hangs off to the side of the regular road bridge where the cars cross. It is made of light silver metal grating. Light passes through it easily, meaning no matter how intensely I stare forward, I get constant flashes in my peripheral vision of how high I am. The bridge also makes this whole series of crazy noises when I cross it. A banging and clanging. A rattle. A jingling sound. It basically sounds like it's about to collapse under me as I ride.
That combination of factors has brought out an intense physical reaction in me. My stomach clenches, my entire body tenses, and I feel a little dizzy. I've been combating that by singing old hymns aloud as I drive across (and staring fiercely ahead, trying hard not to see out of my peripheral vision). I was just telling my mom on Monday night that this has not gotten better with time and repeated practice. In fact, I noted, sometimes I find it getting worse. This, despite my concerted effort to think rationally, to refuse to surrender to panic, to intentionally force my body into unclenching if it can at all, while I cross. I have now fought it long enough and hard enough to be sure: I cannot practice my way or talk my way out of my fear of heights as it exercises itself on that awful bridge.
But God.
I love that phrase!
But God apparently heard my sharing with my mom as a prayer, a request. And ummm... HE ANSWERED! I was stunned to find on Tuesday that the bridge bothered me exactly zero. I noticed in the morning, and thought for sure the fear would be back in the afternoon.
But it wasn't.
So this morning as I rolled up to it, I was both excited and nervous. Was I REALLY healed? Only this test would tell.
Annnd...NO FEAR! It was like a little crowd inside my head went wild this morning as I crossed, just cheering, celebrating, in awe, in wonder. Saying to God, "Did you read my conversation with my mom as a prayer?! TOO COOL! THANK YOU!"
Again today: in the morning, in the evening, it all didn't matter. That visceral physical fear in me about that high place...it's gone. Dead. History. I was so tickled that I exited the bridge, literally laughing aloud.
I'VE BEEN HEALED!
I guess...just because He could? Just to teach me another unexpected thing about His ways?
How about, just because He is good, He loves me, and He's willing to keep peeling back my layers and redeeming them from darkness, one at a time. And maybe, too, because of doors in my heart and mind that are propped wide open to His voice, His ways. I'm not getting it perfectly, by a long shot...but tonight...I am very grateful that He answered my little prayer that I didn't even know was a prayer.
Nifty stuff.
It proved to me that miracle healings don't all work the same.
And it has left me pondering the question, "What is prayer?"
You might recall that I've been terrified of heights my entire life. Like, not just scared of being at the top of the Sears Tower (yeah, I know it's now called the Willis Tower, but I don't have to change with that)...like, scared when I stand on a chair. The fear has been strong, visceral, a physical sensation not just in my stomach but in my entire body, combined with a whole lot of mental/emotional baggage.
You might also recall that the Lord has been doing a work in me, where that is concerned. First I crossed that bridge along the Chicago bike path near downtown without fear. Then I moved back here and have been running on the Centennial Bridge (a place high enough that it was once bordering on debilitating for me to walk it) without fear.
Still, there has been one holdout: the bicycle bridge that connects Illinois to Arsenal Island. It sort of hangs off to the side of the regular road bridge where the cars cross. It is made of light silver metal grating. Light passes through it easily, meaning no matter how intensely I stare forward, I get constant flashes in my peripheral vision of how high I am. The bridge also makes this whole series of crazy noises when I cross it. A banging and clanging. A rattle. A jingling sound. It basically sounds like it's about to collapse under me as I ride.
That combination of factors has brought out an intense physical reaction in me. My stomach clenches, my entire body tenses, and I feel a little dizzy. I've been combating that by singing old hymns aloud as I drive across (and staring fiercely ahead, trying hard not to see out of my peripheral vision). I was just telling my mom on Monday night that this has not gotten better with time and repeated practice. In fact, I noted, sometimes I find it getting worse. This, despite my concerted effort to think rationally, to refuse to surrender to panic, to intentionally force my body into unclenching if it can at all, while I cross. I have now fought it long enough and hard enough to be sure: I cannot practice my way or talk my way out of my fear of heights as it exercises itself on that awful bridge.
But God.
I love that phrase!
But God apparently heard my sharing with my mom as a prayer, a request. And ummm... HE ANSWERED! I was stunned to find on Tuesday that the bridge bothered me exactly zero. I noticed in the morning, and thought for sure the fear would be back in the afternoon.
But it wasn't.
So this morning as I rolled up to it, I was both excited and nervous. Was I REALLY healed? Only this test would tell.
Annnd...NO FEAR! It was like a little crowd inside my head went wild this morning as I crossed, just cheering, celebrating, in awe, in wonder. Saying to God, "Did you read my conversation with my mom as a prayer?! TOO COOL! THANK YOU!"
Again today: in the morning, in the evening, it all didn't matter. That visceral physical fear in me about that high place...it's gone. Dead. History. I was so tickled that I exited the bridge, literally laughing aloud.
I'VE BEEN HEALED!
I guess...just because He could? Just to teach me another unexpected thing about His ways?
How about, just because He is good, He loves me, and He's willing to keep peeling back my layers and redeeming them from darkness, one at a time. And maybe, too, because of doors in my heart and mind that are propped wide open to His voice, His ways. I'm not getting it perfectly, by a long shot...but tonight...I am very grateful that He answered my little prayer that I didn't even know was a prayer.
Nifty stuff.
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